Lost Cause

I have gone way over the edge with AlienSpider. I know that this is my own fault, and I have no one else to blame – but man did I really foul things up this time. I should have realized when I became annoyed with him during Date #2 that it was time to pull-out before I dug myself in any deeper. But nooooo, I can’t just let well-enough alone.

I knew that I shouldn’t have gone out with AS in the first place once I found out he was an actor. I know that I harp on this point a lot (my Celeb List and uncontrollable desire to sleep with George Clooney notwithstanding), but it’s actually a big issue for me. I find myself attracted to actor-types over and over again, and in the end they always disappoint or rip my still-beating heart right out of my chest. Somehow, I manage to maintain the unshakeable belief that there will be an exception to the Actor Rule. Well, I think I should go ahead and break it to myself right now:

THERE IS NO EXCEPTION TO THE ACTOR RULE.

It first started to bother me when he repeated the fact that he was in a movie about alien spiders during dinner on our second date. Obviously, I was quite aware of this fact: I named him based on that damn movie. He then acted like it was new information when I mentioned that I used to work at a talent agency (I worked in the entertainment industry for 4 years before I got into healthcare), even though we had had an entire discussion about my company and how it ranked among the other agencies on our first date. Then he couldn’t remember what state I’m from, even though we had lengthy email discourse about our mutual desires to return to our home states someday (his is Kentucky). It was like having the first date all over again. Now, I definitely don’t hold anyone to the standard of remembering every thing that comes out of my mouth – but remembering anything would be a big help. I have been dating multiple people, and corresponding with even more, and I still managed to remember key conversational topics. Is it too much to ask that he do the same?

This is something that’s symptomatic of his true status as an actor-type. The focus on self and the desire for constant attention tend to outweigh the ability to thoughtfully listen to someone else speak. And it’s only gotten worse with subsequent conversations. On the phone on Tuesday, he got very excited remembering something that I had told him. “Oh right! You used to…” But I didn’t. The only thing that he thought that he remembered I had told him turned out to be something that I had never told him at all.

But, true to form, I could not confront the issue in person. I know that it’s chicken of me, but I just prefer to break things off over the phone. I just have to console myself with the fact that many people never have the respect to break things off at all, and just pull the classic Fade-Away or Disappearing Act. But that was most definitely my last date with AlienSpider. Actually, I hope that it was my last date with an actor period.

Unless, that is, George Clooney comes a-callin’.

What's that you said George? Oh, you'd like me to come home with you. Well, gosh, I don't think that I have any other plans...

Lyrics of the Day

“Everybody is so make-believe, it’s true. I used to be sad, now I’m just bored with you.” Ryan Adams Burning Photographs