(A preemptive apology to SJP is required here - I did not take your advice. If I live to regret it, you are quite welcome to say "I told you so." I have a million reasons for not taking it, although I know that I'm probably just banging my head against a familiar wall in the end.)
Let me first explain the nickname, as it has nothing to do with an actual romantic relationship between My Husband and myself. It all began because The Figa Master has a female friend that he refers to (quite ironically) as his Wife. He likes her and enjoys her company, but she has feelings for him that extend beyond their friendship. Although she is aware that he doesn't reciprocate, she still treats him as much like a Significant Other as she can get away with. Upon learning about this, I thought that was such an apt name for her - and that it applied in the same way to My Husband, hence the nickname.
Back in The Day, I worked with My Husband at an entertainment company (the same one where I met the fabulous SJP). Throughout the time that we worked together, we were friendly but not close. When I left the company (to go back to school), I was also moving out of my apartment. MH had mentioned that he used to be a mover back in college and offered to help me move. That was really the beginning of it all.
I've tried on many occasions to figure out how this friendship really happened and how it has managed to go so wrong, so many times. The problem is that MH really likes to drink, and I'm a very impressionable, innocent young girl (but you all knew that). So much of the time that we've spent together is a bit clouded in my memory. This is not to say that there has been any inappropriate conduct, because there hasn't. That's the one place where my conscience is clear.
We began hanging out quite a lot. I was on the rebound from the Speed Freak and in the middle of starting a new life. MH was excited to find a new activity partner, because we share a lot of the same interests. We went to movies, we went out to eat, we sat in front of the TV and drank and smoked and debated books and sports and politics. He helped me move twice within two months. He insisted on paying for everything. He called me at least once a day. He masterminded the surprise party that was thrown for my 24th birthday. And somehow, all of this time, I was able to persuade myself that this friendship was kosher.
Lyrics of the Day
"She says, 'Space is not just a place for stars. I give you an inch, you want a house with a yard.'" The Good Life Album of the Year