I haven't mentioned The Kid since I met Prince Charming. It's not becauase I immediately forgot he existed the moment that I laid eyes on PC, but my attraction and connection to PC did eclipse my arrangement with The Kid so completely tat I almost wonder why I did it in the first place. On the other hand, I don't have any regrets about hanging out with The Kid - it just can't compare to anything that I have with Prince Charming.
What I do have, concerning The Kid, is some increasing guilt. I've never had The Kid's email address, but we are MySpace friends and that's the way that we've communicated online. Shortly after I got to Baltimore, The Sister posted a comment on my page about the fact that I'm not single anymore. A day or two later, The Kid posted "Miss ya" as a comment on my page. When I realized the timing of that comment, I started to feel a bit guilty. I mean, there's been a bit of guilt all along: I did happen to meet PC the day after the last time that I saw The Kid. But I've been trying to push the feeling down: I could never have known that I was going to meet my Prince Charming in bar, three days before I moved out of LA. There was no reason to think I shouldn't draw out my time with The Kid as much as possible. Then, just last Wednesday night, I uploaded the pics that PC and I took last weekend onto my MySpace page. And while I'm absolutely thrilled and proud to have the pics to show-off, I do get a bad feeling in my stomach when I think about what to do / say regarding The Kid. Because we are friends, but the situation is just so weird.
Even my subconscious knows this. The other night I had a dream that I had promised to sleep with The Kid again, he even blew off someone else because he was sure he was going to be hooking up with me, and I felt like I was absolutely obligated to do it. I felt this even though I was with Prince Charming in the dream. My dream-self was in absolute agony over the situation. Don't worry though: in the end my heart just wouldn't let me do it.
Lyrics of the Day
" On the night you left I came over, and we peeled the freckles from our shoulders. Our brand new coats so flushed and pink, and I knew your heart I couldn't win, 'cause the season's change was a conduit and we'd left our love in our summer skin." Death Cab For Cutie Summer Skin
6 months ago