And I'm Off...

To my faithful and much-loved readers,

I am [finally] off to Montana tomorrow morning. After the week that I've had, the coming rest couldn't be at a better time. I fully intend to update at least a couple of times during my vacation, if not more frequently. However, I do have a bad habit of shunning the computer while I'm in the vast open spaces of my home-state so you will have to forgive me if I am lax in fulfilling my bloggy duties.

Before I crash (and I almost mean that literally, so hard will my head hit the pillow when I finally make it to bed), I want to drop a couple of updates:

1. My third date with Mr. Hawaii was cancelled on Wednesday night, with a reschedule pending. He had an interview that necessitated time for deep, meaningful soul-searching as to whether or not to enact a drastic life change. I'm going to email him while gone and we'll see if Date #3 happens or not...

2. My student happened to catch a glimpse of Brit Nurse running into the hospital on an off-day today. She said that he was wearing a sleeveless shirt, and that contrary to my belief that few men can pull off this look, he most certainly can. She said, "He obviously works out." Now, I still have to figure out how (and whether, really) to break me off a piece of That!

3. There was an actual *promising* email in my Match inbox today. Wyoming Guy is, obviously, from WY and seems to be intelligent and interesting and interested in me to top it all off. Coincidentally, he is leaving this weekend for WY just as I am leaving for MT, so the communication will be slow-going, but hopefully will turn out better than the sad story that was McDreamy.

I hereby do vow to return to Los Angeles with a better tan, mosquito bites, photos of Big Sky Country to share, mementos of my time, and hopefully some good stories. If I'm ridiculously lucky, one or more of those stories will involve me making out with some incredibly adorable boy who has never even entertained the notion of shaving his legs, unless he happens to be a professional swimmer.

Lyrics of the Day

"I'm going up, going over to Montana. You got yourself a trucker's atlas. You knew you were all hot, well maybe you'll go and blow a gasket." Modest Mouse Trucker's Atlas

Saturday Night's Alright

I've been meaning all week to post a bit about my Saturday night last weekend, because it was fun, and I had a little Hollywood celeb sighting action.

It was my girl SJP's birthday (well, actually on Sunday, but we were celebrating on Sat. night) and so two of her best friends and I all went to a swanky Santa Monica hotel, The Viceroy, for dinner and drinks. I've been spending a lot of time lately with people who are married (mostly people I work with) or in relationships, and I was beginning to think that I'm the only Single Girl Over 25 in the whole damn town. It was refreshing to hang out with these girls, who are all gorgeous, intelligent, professionally successful, and single. Plus, they're a blast to hang out with.

We had a great dinner, with a bottle of wine and a birthday brownie (candle and all). Then we squeezed through the throngs of hipsters, industry-types, Hollywood wannabes and Beautiful People on our way out to the outdoor pool area. We had a couple of drinks, randomly ran into someone that SJP when to high school with (I keep telling you, this is a small town!), and just had fun people watching and girlie bonding. Toward the end of the evening, once it was officially SJP's birthday, we made our way over to the doors. Standing there, waiting for one of the girls to return from the ladies' room, I looked over and thought, "Is that ...? Yes, I think it is!"

That's right, "superstar" Colin Farrell. He looked pretty much like this, but was wearing a newsboy cap.

I am not the kind of person to approach celebs, but we watched with amusement as wave after wave of girls swarmed him. He was actually very nice about it all, spent a couple of minutes talking with each group, and was remarkably well-behaved in general. It would have been far more entertaining had he been plowed and trying to sleep with anyone who came close enough (thus, living up to his man-whore reputation), but alas, he seemed sober enough. I was actually a big fan when he first started being noticed, but it makes me sad that his extracurricular activities have far outshone his acting talent at this point. I mean, the guy already has an E! True Hollywood Story and his first big movie was only 6 years ago.

All in all, a good night. Happy Birthday SJP!

Lyrics of the Day

"I know a movie star, I've got her plastered to my wall just like we're dear old friends. Like she already knows me." Guster Barrel of a Gun

Flashback

My first real relationship began in February of 2003 – I was a very late bloomer in the Boys Department. The boy (and I do emphasize the term) was an actor who happened to be a client at the agency where I was working at the time and was significantly younger than I. He had a supposed case of ADD and a rather unhealthy affection for prescribing large doses of Adderol (sort of a grown-up version of Ritalin) for himself. ADD Boy and I hit it off quickly, suddenly became BF & GF and began what was to be a year of near-complete misery for both of us. We “fell in love” though at this point I’m not sure it was much more than desperate infatuation on my part. He moved to Chicago to go to college, we tried the long-distance thing, broke up, got back together, broke up, got back together. We both hurt each other in horrible ways. We broke up for good in March of 2004 – when he broke up with me the same week that I was moving out of my apartment, quitting my job and starting school again. I told him that doing this at this time meant losing me forever, but he wouldn’t reconsider. Four months later when he popped up again and proposed that we get back together, I said no. I think that we talked two or three times between then and December 2005, which was the last time that we actually communicated.

I don’t do well with being friends after a break-up. So far, I have been the one to walk away with my heart in little tiny pieces, and while I can get over it, it prevents me from wanting to be friends with the person who destroyed me. When ADD Boy tried to contact me earlier this year, I didn’t respond. I know that may seem very petty of me – but we weren’t friends before we started dating, and he had never made any effort to become a substantial part of my life. I spent most of the relationship catering to his whims and scheduling, so when he was gone very little changed for me. I slept alone for the entirety of every night, instead of just the majority.

This brings me to my point: I had an incredibly vivid dream involving ADD Boy last night, and I’m not sure why. I haven’t had occasion to think of him much lately, so why he has crawled out of my sub-conscious is baffling to me.

I was back in Vegas with The Mother, The Sister and The Godmother. While on the way to meet The Godmother, I put two nickels into a slot machine and managed to win about three dollars. I was very happy with this, and proceeded to try another machine. This time I didn’t win. The Godmother was giving some sort of lecture/presentation in a large conference room and I went there to meet her; The Mom, The Sis and I were about to leave Vegas. Nearly as soon as I walked into the room I saw him: ADD Boy. I was extremely surprised that he was there, but was polite and hugged him and asked him how he was. He said that he had finished school (something that could potentially be true right about now) and was going to Australia for some reason or another. I told him congratulations, and that I was happy for him. (I just now am realizing that he didn’t actually ask me anything about what I was doing – which is also pretty in-character.) I hugged him again, saying that I had to leave. Then he reached up and brushed my bangs from my forehead. It was such an intimate gesture that I was taken aback. I was offended that he thought he could still touch me like that, like a boyfriend, after all that time and all that had happened. Then I thought about how long it had been since anyone had touched me with such familiarity, and I felt suddenly sad.

That’s most of what I remember. It’s so strange; upon waking I could almost feel that touch on my forehead. Actually, I still can – just a ghost of a ghost of a touch.

Lyrics of the Day

“And I’ll only kiss your shadow; I cannot feel your hand. You’re a stranger now unto me.” Simon & Garfunkel The Dangling Conversation

I Am a Monster

It's so funny (more funny-weird than funny-haha) that I've been thinking all night/day about writing this post, then hop online to discover that readers are already agreeing with me! I think I may be in a bit of trouble here...

I swear, my intentions have been good. I really do want to meet people. I really do want to find someone to date for a while, if not something more. I really do make a sincere effort at getting to know the people that I'm going out with. But I'm having the same problem over and over again. I'm just not interested in them. I'm trying to decide what to disclose here, and I think that I had better just get to the truth of it all, so here goes...

I have some crazy, deep-seated fear of intimacy. I know that's terribly cliche, and usually applied when talking about men, but it's the truth. I have a near insurmountable inability to be attracted to anything but unavailable men. I know that I've mentioned this before, but I want to try to really send it home. Every time I find myself incredibly, or even slightly, attracted to someone, he turns out to be unavailable in some way. Secretly has a girlfriend, has been hurt so much in the past that he's light years from being able to open up again, has no actual romantic interest in me, has no desire to be in a relationship of any kind - you name it, it attracts me. Because, if I become involved with an unavailable man, there is no actual chance of having to become truly close to him. And because my crazy intimacy issues make me fairly emotionally unavailable, unavailable men are attracted to me in turn, because I serve the same purpose for them. It all leads to a cat-chasing-its-tail scenario that usually ends in me feeling completely destroyed and heartbroken - no matter that it was all inevitable in the first place.

This, actually, is the reason for the mutual attraction between myself and Cheese, whom I last saw at the 4th of July bbq. He and I have had an on-and-off flirtation (with a make-out session or two stuck in the middle) for the past 2 and a half years or so. After the 4th of July thing, I realized exactly why that attraction is there: neither of us are truly available, and so we're both ideal candidates for non-relationship-type interaction with each other. Ridiculous I know, but at least I'm not fooling myself into thinking that something could actually happen with him, because that's how I often like to torture myself.

This brings us to the men that I've been meeting and dating. Anyone who's been following long enough knows that of all the guys that I've gone out with so far, only one of them truly interested me. And this is because he was the only one that was actually unavailable. The rest are terribly sweet, smart, usually funny guys - and they would all be willing to enter into a relationship with me. Unfortunately for both of us, this makes them near-repulsive to the Scared Little Girl that controls my subconscious.

So what do I do about this? My recent theory has been that I can work through it by genuinely getting to know these guys that I'm dating, and not to let my gut reaction (Available = Run Away As Fast As I Can) dictate my actual actions. But it leaves me feeling like a liar. Instead of enjoying myself, or being really into the guy, I tend to spend a lot of each date wondering how soon I can go home and get some sleep (something that is far too elusive for me these days). I was kissing AlienSpider at the end of our date last night and I could tell that he was really into it. All I could think was: This is really nice, I should really be enjoying this. He's a really nice kisser. When is this going to stop so that I can go to bed? I feel terrible about having these thoughts in my head, but I can't seem to block them out.

So what do I do? At what point should I just give up, and hope that I can find some way to repair my damaged psyche without going on unenthusiastic dates? Or should I continue, and have faith in the fact that if I really meet someone good for me, I'll recognize it? Should I just adopt 4 more cats and be satisfied with a future as the Scary Cat Lady? Frankly, I'm at a roadblock. I'm turning in circles, looking for a way to move beyond this, but I just can't seem to find one.

Lyrics of the Day

"Life is a series of callouses, this is just another layer. So build 'em up, tough it out. Yeah that's your skin, don't let anyone under there." The Good Life Inmates

Unintentional Date - the Truth Revealed

Those of you who have been following for awhile may remember another brush with Co-Worker Romance (aside from my currently-raging crush on Brit Nurse) back in June: The Unintentional Date. Well, the story has continued a little beyond what I've shared, and now we have New Revelations.

The whole story with Mr. Fix-It started on my birthday. I came into my lab the day after and found an envelope with my name printed on it. Inside of this envelope was a card with a little note from Mr. Fix-It saying he is responsible for greeting May birthdays for my department (why I didn't smell something fishy at this point is beyond me, since my department consists of me and my helper) and that I was entitled to lunch for two at the restaurant of my choosing in honor of my day of birth. I wasn't sure how to proceed, but didn't think much of it so I tossed it into my bag and forgot about it in general. When the Unintentional Date happened, Handy Man mentioned the lunch card when setting up his little scheme, so I figured that if anything actually did need to be redeemed in that area, it had been done. The lunch happened, and Mr. Fix-It went off to train before being sent to Iraq.

At the going-away party that Mr. Fix-It's department threw for him, all of the employees that are friendly with Mr. FI wrote down our email addresses to receive updates on his training and mission. Shortly after leaving, I began to get Mr. FI's mass-emailed missives - but I also received some personal emails as well. I thought all was understood in the Friendly Co-Worker vs. Potential Life-Partner debate, until I got this email:

.....well actually the lunch coupon was a seperate thing.....OK, OK, I might as well say it now, I was trying to ask you out to lunch without making it awkward for the involved parties. I thought I'd put a little gimmick to it, and it was a nice way to get to know you. So if you're still interested in the lunch part, I'll be back in a few months. Take care now.

I really do think that Mr. FI is a very sweet guy, but I'm just wondering: what in the hell about this whole situation avoided awkwardness?? It feels like the time in 8th Grade when my friends decided that I should "go out" (translation: become automatic BF/GF with) a 6th grader and then asked him out for me. That debacle lasted nearly 24 hours before the mutual decision to call it off was reached. Point being: this situation has overflowed with awkwardness of the most middle-school kind, so it makes me laugh that he says he was trying to avoid it. I understand shyness and all, but JEEZ. What a crazy ploy.

Lyrics of the Day

"I love you - period. Do you love me - question mark. Please, please - exclamation point. I want to hold you - in parentheses." Dan Baird I Love You Period

Getting Honest - Again

I feel like I've been so behind on my entries, and so rushed in trying to fit them into my currently insane work schedule that I've lost a little of my charm. I'm reading over my recent entries and thinking: when the hell did I get so boring? I mean, let's be honest here, sure I'm blogging for fun and to keep track of all my wacky dating adventures - but I'm also blogging to try to be entertaining. Ever since discovering that other people could actually want to read about my life and find it entertaining, I have loved the response that I've gotten and aimed more and more to make my blog entertaining and visitor-friendly. But as of late, I think things have been a little lack-luster. Well, that is just going to have to change. I am now redoubling my efforts to entertain and am going to do that, for the most part, by being even more honest and forthcoming than I've already been.

Case-in-point: The beach-camping birthday party. Let me first say that I had a great time at this party and was fully ready to gush about it on the bloggy here. But comments that were made to me by a certain person who tends to be all-pervasive in my life made me ashamed of what happened and reluctant to talk about it. But now I've cleared my own conscience, so I'm going to tell a little bit more about that night.

I mentioned that The Sister and I met two guys at the party, and that the four of us became the Sunset Crew. Well, what I didn't really get into is that one of them is extremely cute. The Filmmaker is funny, adorable, fairly unpretentious and seemed to take a real interest in me that night. We talked a lot, and The Sister definitely said she thought he was attracted to me. This is a guy who met me for the first time when I was wearing a bikini - so he's seen just about as much of me as one can and still be in Friend Territory. Then I managed to get a little too drunk (the reasons for this are many, but let's just say that I don't always avoid discomfort in the most productive of ways), and ended up passing out at a pretty early hour. Aside from a little ribbing the next day though, no one said anything negative to me, until The Sis got on my case on the way home. The Filmmaker and friend (the one who used to live in my apartment building - we'll call him Ex-Neighbor Guy, even though we didn't live here at the same time) were just as friendly as before, and I got their email addresses to send them the photos that we had taken all evening on my camera. The Sister said that she would be surprised if we ever heard from them again after the way that I [supposedly] acted. Well - she was wrong.

I actually received enthusiastic emails from both guys in response to the photos from the party. Ex-Neighbor Guy said that we should get together and do it up Hollywood-style (they still live in the general Hollywood neighborhood) and The Filmmaker asked for my MySpace name so that he can send me a friend request. So, if there's a chance of getting together with them again, I'm going to take it and see if I can parlay it into a date with The Filmmaker, because I actually really liked him. And, of course, because he's so cute.

I just really wanted to get that off of my chest. And maybe it didn't end up being more entertaining after all, but at least I'm getting back on the Honesty Track. Mostly the hesitance to share has to do with my current feelings about The Sister - we've just spent way too much time together lately. We do that: first we miss each other, so we hang out a bunch. Then we keep hanging out a bunch because it's easy and we're both usually around. Then we keep hanging out more because it's become habit. Then we start to get really tired of each other and start getting in fights. Finally we end up taking a bit of a break and not spending so much time together so that we can remember that we like each other again. Then the cycle starts over, etc, etc, ad nauseum. That's just how it is with us, and probably how it will always be. So right now we're entering Break Phase, which will be good for both of us.


Lyrics of the Day

"Late nights won't do me justice, 'cuz when I drink I just get so damned depressed and it's not right. I ain't trying to get over you." Augustana Stars and Boulevards

Of Boys and Exhaustion

I know that my weekend was [insanely] busy and all, but I am dragging even more ass than usual this week. Every day so far has felt like Monday, and I have been literally counting down the minutes until I can go home. Blech. I swear, I am getting my road-flattened booty to the gym tomorrow so that I can boost my energy level - I really need it this week!

I ended up stuck on Brit Nurse's floor all morning yesterday, which afforded me a wonderful opportunity to flirt. Almost the moment I got up there, he busted out his new tattoos - some beautiful Chinese lettering that he had done in San Fran over the weekend. We talked for long enough that the student nurse who was training with him seemed pretty annoyed, but hey, I just love to hear those English boys talk. I'm not sure that I even want to cross into actual Work Romance territory with him, but I am enjoying the flirtation for now.

I set up date #2 with AlienSpider last night. I am sticking to my guns about taking this week off socially, so we're going to get sushi next Monday night. We had a fun, easy conversation and I think that we'll have more fun on date #2. He told me a funny story about being at a Korean spa over the weekend and having a steam-room encounter with John Travolta. I told him I hoped he didn't get too close, as I hear that Scientology is contagious.

I also called Mr. Hawaii last night, but by the time he called me back I was too tired to talk (I tend to be very selective about when I'm in the mood to be on the phone - mostly when I'm on the way home, because once I get home I'm in LB Time and I don't really want to talk to anyone.), so I'll talk to him tonight.

I'm giving eHarmony one last shot. I'm communicating with a literal slew of guys right now, and maybe one or two of them will pan out. To be honest, I'm not sure how people can do this internet dating thing all the time, and not burn out. It's hard to sustain enthusiasm for it, especially after so many dates with such small amounts of actual chemistry. There's a large part of me that's really just holding out for a Montana boy - which is what I'm hoping to snag when I'm home for a vacation in just under two weeks. If that falls through, at least I'll have some fun hometown stories to share.

Lyrics of the Day

"I'm so tired, my mind is on the blink. I wonder should I get up and fix myself a drink? No, no, no." The Beatles I'm So Tired

Back in Action, Part Three

We rejoin my story on Wednesday morning, when I somehow managed to get out of bed on little more than four hours of sleep and was even able to shave my legs before I left for Vegas. The Sister and I drove and drove and arrived around 10 am in Sin City. We hooked up with The Mother, The Godmother, and The Godmother's son. First stop was the pool, of course, where we scored a free cabana (those things usually cost $350+ to rent for the day) and had a grand old time being treated like kings. Then we went casino-hopping a bit, where I met my New Worst Enemy:

There's a new game in Vegas called Rapid Roulette and that is where I lost all my money. We did some buffet eating, some more gambling, then called it a night. The Sis and I were so exhausted from getting up so early (not to mention getting to bed on the late side of things) that we crashed out pretty quickly. The next morning was breakfast buffet (we know how to EAT!) and some last minute money-losing before jetting back to Los Angeles.

I arrived home just in time to shower, re-pack, and head out to the Valley to pick up Red for the trip up to Napa. Napa ended up being a great time - though all of last weekend went way too quickly. We managed to hit five different wineries on Saturday, and I managed to find a couple of bottles that I really liked. Wine country is beautiful, and tasting has the potential to become a legitimate hobby of mine - I really liked it.

A view of a vineyard from the car - hey it's not like I claim to be a pro or anything!

Some amusing boy-drama went down on Saturday night, when Red picked a guy up at the brewery-type place where we had dinner. He had the act down. I was totally fooled, and so was Red. He seemed so sweet, slightly awkward, maybe a little unsure of himself. But in the end, he turned jerk when he realized that he wasn't getting a Tourist Quickie One-Nighter for his trouble. I spent the evening fending off the advances of Red's guy's friend, who seemed to believe that I was going to hook-up with him by default. Fortunately, he eventually got the message. Sunday we made it back into LA by early evening, by which time I had just enough energy to decide which movie to stare at until I could pass out.

Lyrics of the Day

"Red red wine you make me feel so fine, you keep me rocking all of the time." UB40 Red Red Wine

Quickie

I somehow managed to resist the impulse to stalk Brit Nurse on his floor yesterday - he was working, but I needed my co-worker to do the work on that floor while I took care of other stuff. I had a debate with myself about efficiency vs. stalking my crush, and my practical side won out in the end. But...

I came in this morning to a note from my co-worker that reads:

"Brit Nurse was asking where you were the last time I was on the floor."

He likes me, he likes me, he likes me. *doing the happy dance*

Having a new crush is fun!

Back in Action, Part Two

When we last left our heroine, LB, she had completed a (mostly) successful second date with Mr. Hawaii. The next segment of our story begins the following day, Wednesday July 12...

As I mentioned in my incomplete blog from last Weds, I got my butt kicked at work that day. My least favorite physician (because he makes my life very difficult purely for the purpose of covering his own ass, even at the patient's expense) seemed to psychically know that I would be out of town for the next two days. Therefore he needed to order an exorbitant number of tests, but wait until 3:00pm to do so. So I ended up stuck on a particular floor of the hospital all afternoon, until long after I was supposed to go home. The only benefit to this particular event is that this all occurred on the floor where Brit Nurse works. Ever since the day that he told me about his new relationship status, I have been very friendly on the occasions that we have to chat. Spending two hours on his floor on Wednesday afternoon allowed me a few more occasions to flirt it up with him. I have to say, I honestly think there is a bit of interest there - he definitely goes out of his way to smile at me, wink, talk to me, etc. And of course, I do the same. I'm still not at the point where I think I should aggressively pursue him or anything, but when he's had a little more time to cool something could possibly happen. You never know.

By the end of the day I was completely exhausted and was hoping that AlienSpider would call and cancel the date. Knowing that I had to be in my car by 5:00 am on Thursday, I was really regretting setting the date for that night. But, as you know, AS did not cancel, and the date went on as planned.

We met at the Frolic Room, an old iconic Hollywood bar that is right next door to the Pantages Theater. (For non-Angelenos, the Pantages is one of the main theatre venues in LA - it gets all the touring shows like The Lion King and The Producers, and occasionally big concerts.) It used to be a glamorous hotspot but is now a fabulously divey place with a bit of an old-fashioned feel to it. I may have mentioned before, AS and I have extremely compatible taste in bars, so I knew that I would like the place. I had actually always wanted to go (especially b/c The Frolic Room is featured in LA Confidential, one of my favorite movies), and was happy to have someone take me. We had a lot of fun, talked about all sorts of things, had a couple of drinks, played instant Lotto Keno at the bar. (We won $16!) The funniest part was when we noticed that we were wearing nearly identical outfits: polo shirt, jeans and flip flops. Mildly embarrassing, but amusing nonetheless. We then walked around the neighborhood a little and grabbed a late night snack at a hamburger stand. He's shortish, but he's cute, smart and well-read - even if he is an actor. There will be a date #2.

To Be Continued...

Lyrics of the Day

"And it's one more day up in the canyons, and it's one more night in Hollywood. If you think you might come to California... I think you should." Counting Crows A Long December

Back in Action, Part One

Here I am, FINALLY back from my travels and my craziness and ready to jump back into filling you in on my oh-so-fabulous adventures. I'm going to try to remember everything that I should be disclosing here.

Let's go back to the subject of the beach camping party. I sent out the Sunset Crew pics on Wednesday, and did indeed get a response back from one of the guys that we met. So hopefully some social plans with them can be arranged and I can have an opportunity to hang out with the cute one some more.

Tuesday night last week I had my second date with Mr. Hawaii. I'm trying very hard to work on my ability to give people a real chance before deciding compatibility, and Mr. H is really an exercise for this reason. He's so sweet, and fun to talk to for the most part, but he started this thing on Tuesday night that was driving me nuts. Every time we would find a point about which we disagreed, he'd say something to the effect of "well, that's it, it's over, nice knowing you." And for some reason, we found a lot of these points on Tuesday, so I probably heard that refrain about 7 or 8 times. He hates thrill-seeking things like roller-coasters (which I love), he likes comedy that I consider boring, he likes Tom Hanks (who I consider to be very boring), etc. I just tried to brush past his remarks, because I didn't want to be baited into any other sort of reaction. I wondered a little if he was fishing for reassurance - like he wanted me to say "oh no, I'm sure we can work past this" or something, but I didn't want to go that far. I did find out something very valuable though: we met at one of my favorite sushi restaurants - Katsu-Ya in Studio City. It turns out, the key to amazing sushi at a place like that is to let the waitress order something for you. We asked if there was another type of sashimi dish to try, and the waitress asked if she could choose something for us and it was incredible. All in all, it was an enjoyable date. I just have to think a little on whether it seems wise to go out with him again.

Okay, consider this Part One. In fact, I'm going to rename this Part One and I'll continue the stories in just a bit...

Post-Weekend Update

I obviously missed my promised deadline of yesterday to catch you all up on the events of the weekend, so here I am, trying desperately to get all of the news in before I leave town for the rest of the week/weekend. Here goes...

Friday night I went out for drinks with Tattoo Guy, in our new capacity as friends. We went to a bar that I hadn't been to before in Los Feliz Village, so it was fun to try somewhere new. We had a great time - shared a bottle of wine, talked about all manner of things, had a minor star sighting. There was a moment or two where I felt like he felt some attraction to me (we'll address the difference in the way that I behave with friends vs. dates in an upcoming post - suffice for the moment to say that I'm much more open and forthcoming when there's no romance in the air), but I don't think he'd try anything. He's really a lot of fun, so I think there's real potential there for an actual friendship.

Saturday, The Sister and I did some running, then breakfast, then packed up our stuff to go to the beachy birthday party that we'd been invited to. This is where it took place:

This was a camping party, so it was held at the beautiful beach camping area at San Onofre State Beach in Orange County. We got there and joined right in with the fun. There was drinking, food, sun-bathing, games, surfing, and swimming. The Sis and I made fast friends with a couple of guys that were there. Once again, the crazy smallness of LA came into play. One of the guys used to live in the exact apartment building that I now live in, and he moved out only about 2 months before I moved in. He knew all of my crazy neighbors and the insane drama that surrounds the population of feral cats that inhabits our parking lot. The boys and The Sis and I teamed up as the Sunset Crew and trekked into the wilderness above the beach to watch the sun set.

One of the boys was pretty cute, and mentioned something (as we were bidding our adeus the next day) about getting together in Hollywood sometime. We had already exchanged email addresses for the purpose of picture sharing. So today I finally got to emailing them the Sunset Crew pics. We'll see if I ever hear from either of them again.

(I began this post at whatever time the timestamp says I did it. I then got completely slaughtered at work, and ended up leaving really late. I then hurried to wash my dishes and try to get my house even remotely in order before I leave town tomorrow. Then I went on my date with AlienSpider, which takes me to NOW, which is 11:30 pm and I need to be awake in 5 hours to drive to Vegas. Point being - I have to finish the story of the weekend later, and then I have to relate the stories of the two dates - Mr. Hawaii and AlienSpider - that I went on this week. Phew!!)

Anyway, obviously I have pause now - but I promise full-disclosure of all recent events in the early part of next week. I may have a chance to blog on Friday afternoon, but it depends on what time The Sister and I get back from Vegas. We'll see!!

Lyrics of the Day

"Don't make me come to Vegas, don't make me pull you out of his bed. I am vigilant that it will not be you on the menu that he's serving up for his friends." Tori Amos Don't Make Me Come to Vegas

New Prospects

I can't believe I was almost absent from my blog all day long. I've been meaning to tell you all: at work I am responsible for training students - people who have finished the classroom part of learning the job that I do and now are in need of real-life, on-the-job training. I get a new student every three months. At the beginning of this three months, they basically know nothing, and we work our way toward the point where they can almost do my job for me. I just started with a new student, last Wednesday, which is why I've been toning down my usual verbosity - I just don't have as much time to write. For example: you can go back and look through the archives - I bet this is only the 3rd or 4th post ever written after 7:00pm. Generally I'm just too lazy to get online (esp. with my PATHETIC dial-up connection) when I get home at night. But all of this is leading to a point...

I just talked to AlienSpider on the phone - and it was good! Still wary from my last phone debacle (McDreamy never called back, THANK GOODNESS. I still felt obliged to go out with his dud-y ass, but fortunately he had no similar crises of conscience.), I didn't know how this one was going to work. But it did work, and now I'm actually looking forward to a date - something I haven't done since date #3 with Tall Guy. AlienSpider actually sounds cool on the phone, and our conversation flowed nicely and easily. He's interesting and has things to say, he knows about current events, he likes the same types of bars that I like. Hopefully the date will go as well as the phone call.

I'm also going out on date #2 with Mr. Hawaii tomorrow night. We mentioned going to sushi, and he somehow picked one of my favorite sushi restaurants, so bonus points for him. I'm trying very hard to learn to give people more of a chance before I cross them off of the list, so Mr. Hawaii is the first benefactor of my new experiment. But if the kiss (if one happens) is disastrous, I can't let it go on.

I'll check back in tomorrow to fill y'all in on the events of the weekend. It wasn't completely insane; but there was a lot of fun had, and some cool people were met, so there are some stories to share. Hopefully I'll have a little more time on my hands tomorrow. Cross your fingers for me.

Oh yeah, and I have pics to share!!

Lyrics of the Day

"But I don't mind the days gone rolling away, 'cause all this sunlight feels warm on my face today. But what brings me down now is love, 'cause I can never get enough." Counting Crows Goodnight LA

More MySpace Stalking

Did you know that the number one search phrase that brings Googlers to my blog is "myspace stalking"? I think that's fairly creepy when you try to analyze that. Why would someone Google "myspace stalking"? Do they want to do it? Do they want to find out if everyone else is doing it? Are they looking for the elusive software that will allow them to illegally track exactly who is viewing their MySpace page? (MySpace is adamantly against this - they view it as a violation of privacy, and thank goodness because I don't need ex-boyfriends knowing that I view their pages 4 or 6 times a day. Okay, I don't really do that, I swear. No, really, I don't!) Whatever the reason, I just did a little MySpace stalking of my own...

I looked up McDreamy, just for fun, and to see if I could learn anything additional about him from his MySpace page. It was yet another let-down in the McDreamy story. Not only does it have very little information about him at all, but the pictures are the exact same ones he has on Match. Also, he even references his Match profile - telling interested parties that they should check him out there for more info. *sigh* I just don't see this one going anywhere. And he seemed so promising for those 18 magical hours before we talked on the phone. He's supposed to call me "later this week" to see if we're getting together this weekend. Later this week, to me, means tonight or else I'm making other plans. I actually am supposed to get together with Tattoo Guy on whichever day (Friday or Sunday) that I'm not going to see McDreamy. It's just a friends thing with Tattoo Guy, of course, but I'm actually looking forward to it. I think I'm giving McD an 8pm deadline, then I'm going to call Tattoo Guy and see if he wants to grab a drink tomorrow night.

AlienSpider brought up the idea of meeting up, so that will happen, but probably not until after next week. I'm fairly sure that I haven't told y'all - I'm leaving town for the second half of next week. Thursday and Friday I'm going to be in Las Vegas with my mom and godmother and Friday night through Sunday I'm going to be in Napa Valley doing some wine tastings with a bunch of the girls. It's right in the middle of a prime dating week for me, but it's going to be very worth it. So, after that the first date with AlienSpider and the second date with Mr. Hawaii will be on the schedule.

But hey, if none of this works out in the end, I always have someone to fall back on:






Max, my Non-Human Life Partner







Lyrics of the Day

"Every word you say, every game you play, every night you stay, I'll be watching you." The Police Every Breath You Take

An Attempt at Photo Blogging

I'm hoping to add a bit more of a photo element to this blog, but of course, I'm still figuring out which photos to take and how to make them interesting and pretty. So bear with me...

The wild beach party:

Here I am, in all of my keg-standing glory...

From the 4th of July:

The scary part is, she's not kidding. She really thought that spurs constitute a legitimate fashion statement.

Oh no! The Sister got crabs!

Lyrics of the Day

"You're doomed to repeat the past and nothing is gonna last, I burn all your photographs." Ryan Adams Burning Photographs

The Sea Was Angry That Day

So Monday ended up not being a bust at all, and actually turned out to be a hell of a good time. After I finished up (again) at work, The Sister and I decided to man-up and go out to the beach party. By the time that we got there, the beer was gone, so we picked up a bunch as a way to make friends. There were literally hundreds of people crowded onto the beach, in various states of drunkenness. We had a great time until the cops came down to disperse the stragglers and we all moved to a house just up the street and continued the party.

This was my only night off all weekend, so I was letting loose, and The Sister was in the mood as well, so we were quite the life of the party. I probably couldn’t tell you the name of a single guy that I talked to all night, but I know I did talk to a bunch. The Sis and I ended up really being a hit when we decided to do … keg stands. I hadn’t done a keg stand since the 4th of July (coincidentally) 1999, but it seemed like a good idea at the time. I have to say, I was a champ. Eventually, The Sis and I got tired and decided to call it a night – with a very foolish trip to Denny’s. Once again, we stuffed our faces late-night with all sorts of horrible grease that we didn’t really need, but dang did it taste good at the time. Eventually we made it home and passed out.

We awoke on the 4th feeling less-than-fresh. I got paged at about 9, so we got up and I came to work and got that out of the way, praying that it would be the only time that I had to be in the hospital that day. We then blew off all our intended early day plans and sat on my couch until about 2pm, watching the worst movie I have ever seen, Must Love Dogs. This is actually an appropriate interjection: this movie is about internet dating – sort of. It stars John Cusack, a longtime crush of mine, so I thought that I’d at least like to see it because he was in it. Boy, was I wrong. The moral of the story is that internet dating is for losers, but if your sister just happens to make up an online profile for you or your friend forces you to go out with some chick he found online, then it’s sort of okay to do it. It made me a little ill, and was the most excruciatingly awful thing I’ve seen in a very long time. Think of the worst movie you’ve seen in the last 5 years. I’m pretty sure I’d rather watch that one twice than have to watch Must Love Dogs again.

For the afternoon, we had a barbeque down at Venice beach to go to. The head cook at Bodega has a great little place right off of the beach in the nice part of Venice and he was throwing a smallish party. It turned out to be a great time. We ate (what would you expect at a chef’s party besides GREAT food?), drank (though I hardly drank, as I was on-call), and laughed our butts off. The Sister left around 7, to go meet the Bartender; Jam, Cheese (one of the owners of Bodega), Bob Sugar (as in: the Jay Mohr character in Jerry Maguire) and I decided to go swimming in the ocean. It was amazingly warm and we had the best time.

On the way back from the water, Jam couldn’t stop saying “The sea was angry that day” and she decided that was her new catch phrase. For some reason, that just doesn’t stop being funny. Then we eventually congregated on the beach to watch the fireworks. We could see the Marina Del Rey show and the Santa Monica Pier display, so we split our attention, though the MDR show was much better. After that, we called it a night.

I don’t think I’ve mentioned this before, but there’s a little something between Cheese and I, and there pretty much always has been. We spent a lot of the night hanging out last night, and did a little cuddling at the fireworks. It’s a little bit of a story, so I’ll save it for a separate post.

Pictures will be forthcoming, I just didn’t have time to upload anything between last night and this morning, but I do have some shots to share.

Lyrics of the Day

“It's the same on the weekends as the rest of the days and I know I should go but I'll probably stay, and that's all you can do about some things. I'm trying to drink away the part of the day that I cannot sleep away.” Modest Mouse Polar Opposites

And the Plot Worsens...

This day is going quickly to hell. I hadn't had a single new request come into work today, so as soon as we finished all the weekend stuff, I deemed it appropriate to take off. Of course, as soon as I get home (all the way across town), I get a call telling me to come back to work. This, all in the middle of the fact that plans for the beach party were cancelled, then back on, then tenuous at best. Me going back to work sent the tenuous plans spinning to the side of cancelled again, and now we're just in a state of limbo. The Sister is enormously cranky, I'm cranky, our friends are flaking and there's a general lack of well-rested positivity.

*big, gigantic, melodramatic sigh*

I may just end up at home, eating junk food and watching crappy movies OnDemand all night. Which wouldn't be so bad really...

Lyrics of the Day

"Everything that keeps me together is falling apart." Modest Mouse Third Planet

Let Downs

I'm pretty sure this post is going to be a serious let down for anyone hoping for another dose of my usual weekend insanity. This weekend I did...

Pretty. Much. Nothing.

Friday night I watched a little TV with The Sister and went to bed insanely early. I was rudely awoken at 7:00am on Saturday by the pager, so I ran into the hospital for a very tough patient. I managed to complete the study in time to hike Runyan Canyon with The Sis in stupidly ridiculous heat. We nearly died of heat stroke, but made up for it by going out to the beach.

Now I just have to interject on myself here. Where has etiquette gone? I seriously cannot believe the way that some people behave in relation to other people. The Sister and I went to a beach up the PCH called Topanga. It's a fairly unknown little spot, so it's nearly all Malibu locals and savvy LA residents. It rarely gets packed for this reason, so it's a good place to go if you like your personal space. Or so we thought. At some point, a family with three small children arrived and after surveying the ample available sand space, they decided to park themselves three feet from our heads. We spent the rest of the afternoon cursing our bad luck and debating the rudeness factor of blantantly moving our blanket. In the end we suffered the crying, running and sand kicked all over us in favor of remaining discrete. But, come on people, couldn't you have moved just a few feet back??

Saturday night I went to meet Kenny Flask and some friends at the Saddle Ranch (I can't believe how often I've been there lately, but this trip solidified my resolve to stay out of there on weekend nights - WAY too overwhelming, even on a holiday weekend). I got there late and ended up getting paged back to the hospital 20 minutes later. But in the meantime, I did get to see two girls ride the bull in skirts, and saw a particular frosted blonde and Extra-Tall Guy standing across the bar. Funny what a small town LA always ends up being. But as I had to make a quick getaway, I didn't have a chance for an embarrassing encounter. Then, I went to the hospital, and managed to run out of gas on the way home. I haven't done that since college and the timing couldn't have been worse. It was 1:00am and I was on-hold with AAA (I was nowhere near a gas station) for 25 minutes, during which I fell asleep. When the finally answered, had to wait another 30 minutes for the driver to show, so didn't make it home until almost 2:30, by which time I was completely exhausted.

Sunday I did even less. I made a half-assed trip to Melrose with The Sis in the interest of shopping, but neither of us was really in the mood. I had called McDreamy on Saturday evening, with no answer, but he called me back just as The Sis and I were leaving Melrose.

I am sad to say, that I think McDreamy is going to be a dud. There was just something lacking in the conversation, and I don't see this turning out well. I'm still going to go out with him, probably next weekend, but it may only be one date. I don't know if this will make sense to anyone, but he loves chain restaurants. I'm not completely against them or anything, but I feel like a love for chains represents a certain lack of imagination and adventurous spirit. *sigh* I could be wrong in being so pessimistic, but I don't think that I am.

I owe emails both to AlienSpider and Mr. Hawaii, which I'll get to today. I'm sort of talking to a slew of people on eHarmony, but none of them are very interesting at this point. My membership for eHarmony is up on the 20th, and I'm not going to renew. Aside from Tall Guy, I haven't met anyone else on the site, and it just doesn't seem to be the dating demographic that I'm hoping for. There are an inordinate number of Asian scientists on eHarmony, which is interesting to me. Is there a secret fraternity and they all decided to sign up together?

I apologize for the lack-luster entry today. I'm over-tired and over-caffeinated (I'm about to jump out of my skin, in all honesty). Tonight I'm hitting a huge beach party in Manhattan Beach with The Sis and the Bodega crew. I'm off-call tonight, my only night off in this holiday weekend, so I'm hoping to use it to the fullest. Tomorrow I'm on-call, but The Sis and I are hooking back up with the Bodega crew in Venice for a bbq party at someone's house. Maybe at one of these functions I'll meet me an eligible bachelor. Or at least someone good for a little holiday fun.

Happy 4th of July!

Lyrics of the Day

"That's when I know that I have to get out 'cause I have been there before. So I gave up my seat at the bar and I head for the door." Counting Crows Mrs. Potter's Lullaby